Monday, February 8, 2010

FAMILY WEEKEND AT FT KNOW

Days crept by, nights were long, cold and lonely, and not a single day passed that I didn't daydream about being in his arms again. I wrote many letters, went through many boxes of Kleenex, and found a support group in my family and friends.

Finally, six weeks after he left, and merely nine weeks from the date we were united in marriage, I got a phone call that Family Weekend was nearing, and I could come and see him. My heart raced as I packed a suitcase and hit the road.

The drive was long, my thoughts fluttered, and finally I arrived at the Super 8 Hotel in Elizabeth Town, KY. I had difficulties sleeping that night, as I simply couldn't wait to see my husband.

Finally, it was time to get ready...and boy did I ever!!! I spent hours curling my hair and making sure everything was perfect. I remember that I wore his favorite jeans and an Army green tank top with front pockets, along with my Tiffany "dog tags" necklace. I waited for what seemed like an eternity for the call to come, but it didn't...so, I drove to the base and wondered around aimlessly, unsure of where I was going...but knowing exactly whom I was looking for! Everyone looked the same to me though...uniforms, boots, shaved heads. The buildings were like little soldiers, all lined up perfectly, all seemingly identical to the one before it and after it...

It was much later that evening, and I had returned alone to the hotel, saddened, disheartened, confused...but I finally got the call that I could come get him! I raced to get there as quickly as I could, and I'll never forget when I first saw him! I couldn't get to him fast enough, and I wrapped my arms around him for the biggest hug I could ever remember giving: "no public display of affection", he said to me as he pushed me away at arms length...

He showed me around, this had been his new "home", new people, new friends, new environment. His world had changed, while mine remained exactly the same, only without him...

We left the base and went to Red Lobster; he wanted to have "a real meal". I remember staring at him; I watched as he ate, I watched as he talked, and as he smiled. I couldn't soak him up enough!!!

That night, at the hotel, he reached up to put his bag on the top shelf of the closet. He had taken a shower and didn't have a shirt on. I smiled...because his arms and shoulders evidenced the intense training he had undergone while he was away. Finally, after two and a half years of watching his 6'2" frame wither away to a mere 130 pounds, he looked healthy. I saw a pride in him that I had never before seen. I saw a sincere smile, a solace self. I was proud of the man I loved, possibly for the first time since I met him.

People had asked me why I would marry a drug addict, and I couldn't for the life of me explain it to anyone. I loved him, yes...but more than that I saw something in him that even HE failed to recognize. He was brilliant, he was capable, and he was able to be so much more. The Army had given him what I knew he deserved, and made him into the man that I was proud to call my husband.

We talked all night long;neither of us wanting to go to sleep, because we knew that meant we only had one remaining day to be together. We held on to those moments for as long as we could before sleep beckoned us in....

The next morning, I awoke in the same position I went to sleep in...in his arms...and it felt so good to be there! I lied there quietly and watched him sleep, and I prayed that it would go on for much longer.

.....

The day flew by, and it was time to say our good-byes. He hugged me, kissed me, told me he loved me, and walked away. I stood at my Jeep door, not wanting to move, but knowing I had to. I tried to be strong in his presence, as to not upset him. As I backed out of my parking spot, I looked back at him; he was sitting under a tent with two other soldiers, his knees bent up, his elbows resting upon them and his face in his hands. I knew he was crying without seeing the tears...

As I drove away that day, I cried..and I cried...and I cried the entire drive back home, but I left knowing that this was the beginning and not the end. I knew this was the life we both wanted, and that we would be able to take this journey together.

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